wink     ; )

Thoughts on blogging

This post by Julie about transparencly and self-censorship in blogging prompted me to finally put into words some of my feelings about blogging.

I have a hard time with this blog. Part of that is because I don't have as much time as I would like to devote to it. But another part of it is that I am not truly anonymous here. Many people who read this know me, and know me well, in person. That's great in some ways, but it causes problems in others. Particularly, I censor myself a lot.

There are all sorts of things that I want to say but don't: rants and criticisms and embarassing stories. There are really intimate and personal things that, for reasons that I don't understand, I would rather share with a world of strangers than with the people who know me best.

Because of this (and my lack of time), I post infrequently or, at times, not at all. And when I do post, the posts are usually short and insubstantial (or very occasionally, cryptic).

But my dillema goes a bit deeper than just self-censoring. I find myself being deliberately boring here. I could post all sorts of fascinating yet insubstantial stuff here and not worry about the wrong people reading the wrong things. But instead I write stuff that I know is tedious and banal. I do this not just because I'm self-censoring, but because I'm actively driving some of my readers away. I know that if my post frequency gets above a certain level, or if my posts maintain a certain level of substance, then cetain friends/family members will actually pay attention to what I'm saying here instead of only dropping in thrice a year.

For reasons that I don't really understand myself, I don't want that to happen.

So I deliberately hobble this site. Sorry to those of you who want better from me here. I don't really know what a good solution is. I could go totally anonymous: set up a completely new blog and tell no one about it. I've considered this. But I'd be losing a bit too much (of what I don't know) by doing that. And I've thought about just saying what I want to--who cares if my friends and family know. I'm still considering this one. There are other ideas out there too, but none really strike me as approriate yet. So until I figure out what to do and get the guts to do it, this site will continue to hobble along as it has been--boring and tedious.

Sorry.

You can't persuade the public using Math

Daring Fireball is ragging on Napster-to-go. One of his main complaints is that "$15 a month is $180 per year. That’s a lot more than most people spend on music, isn’t it?" He seems to think that "doing the math" (as Napster's new slogan goes) will make people realize that it is a lot cheaper to not use Napster.

While I agree with DF on the math, I don't think that that will make any difference in the public's reaction. As Joel points out: "[Y]ou finally get the focus group to agree that your software is worth $25 a month, and then you ask them how much they would pay for a permanent license and the same people just won't go a penny over $100."

People just don't think sensibly when dealing with monthly costs. I think that Napster-to-go will fail, but not becuase of how expensive it is. I think it will fail because people like to "own" their music. People want to know that once they've paid for it, their music is theirs forever (or for as long as they can find a player that can play it). The idea that your music becomes inaccessible when you stop paying the subscription fee just kind of freaks people out. The music files are there...why can't they be listened to? DivX (the rental service, not the codex) failed for this reason, and Napster-to-go will fail too if they pursue this marketing strategy.

Children's Books review - Baby's Animal Friends

One of Spark's favorite books is Baby's Animal Friends. Unfortunately, I cannot stand it, and neither can Tree. The text is completely random from page to page (published, appropriately, by Random House), thus giving it the feel of watching TV while someone with ADD is holding the remote. At the risk of violating copyright, the text of the book is reproduced after the fold. (If Random House or Phoebe Dunn is reading this and would like me to take this down, just let me know and I'll happily do so.)

The Rapture

Syndromes asked me:

Do you believe in 'the rapture' and things like that? I'd like to talk to a fundamentalist a bit to get a better feel for where they're coming from.

Hmmm...where to start? Well, first of all, I probably wouldn't be considered a "Fundamentalist". A more accurate classification for me would be "Evangelical". Both groups consider the Bible to be the inerrant Word of God, but "Fundamentalists" demand a level of literalness that not all "Evangelicals" demand. Also, Fundamentalism denotes a certain level of militancy which is not implied by Evangelicalism.

While I do believe that everything that the Bible affirms is true, I don't believe that everything in the Bible is meant to be taken literally. Determining what is meant to be literal and what is meant to be figurative or spiritual can be quite difficult.

While virtually all Fundamentalists and most Evangelicals are politically conservative, I am politically rather liberal. But that is a topic for another post.

Though I am not a Fundamentalist, I am quite familiar with their frame of mind. I have been surrounded with Fundamentalists in the past and I go to school with a number of them right now. So while I can't answer Syndrome's questions as a Fundamentalist, I can still present their mindset if he is still interested.

But the question isn't "What do Fundamentalists believe about the rapture?", it is "Do I believe in the Rapture?".

Allow me to dodge yet again. Regarding the period of time commonly known as the "End Times", the only belief that I hold very tightly is my belief that Jesus is coming again. Everything else, from the time and manner of His return, to the timing and nature of the tribulation and/or millenium, to the rapture and the new heavens and new earth are all topics where I hold my beliefs very lightly because I feel the Bible doesn't comment on them in a very concrete manner. As a result of the vague and heavily symbolic language regarding the End Times, we can know little for sure about the events surrounding the Return of the King (that being Jesus in this case, not Aragorn).

(For those who have the burning need to know my lightly held beliefs and are familiar with the jargon, I am post-trib, pre-mill. Though a friend of mine has proposed a new theory which is convincing to me; it would require a new classification, probably something like post-trib, post-post-mill.)

So. Returning to the question of the Rapture. Do I believe in it? Sure. But as for the timing or the nature of the Rapture, I have no idea. My picture of the End Times looks nothing like the one presented in the "Left Behind" series, though I was brought up in a church that would fully endorse that series.

(Syndromes: does that answer your question? Do you want more of a Fundamentalist point-of-view? For Pete's sake, drop me an email so I can discuss more privately. Or IM me or something.)

Poor Execution

"Language is a great idea poorly executed." Or so Alex says. I have to agree with her. Of course, her complaint is about language in general and her inability to express what she wants. My complaint is in the fact that we have more than one language. Or, more precisely, that the number of languages that I need to understand exceeds the number of languages that I actually understand. Grrrrrr...

I hereby curse the idiot who thought that building the Tower of Babel was a good idea.

Matrix thoughts

Was I right about Matrix:Revolutions? Read on to find out. [SPOILERS AHEAD. DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW]

Omni-Will

There is some interesting discussion about the compatibility (or non-compatibility) of omniscience and free-will. It started off at The Raving Atheist (actually, it started with this post, the other link is the latest post on the subject), and has continued over at The World Wide Rant. There is a nice summary of the events over at Rob's Blog.

Since I am not smart enough to keep my mouth shut when controversial subjects come my way, I am now plunging into the fray.

Enjelani Posts

I really meant to post responses to beefeater in all three of my "Enjelani Overflow" comments sections, as well as on Enjelani's site. Unfortunately, schoolwork and depression intervened. Though I still have plenty to say, it seems untimely now.

Should I go ahead and take the time to post my thoughts? Or should I just let the matter drop?

(I'm leaning towards just letting the matter drop and investing the time in more actual posts for this site.)

Enjelani Overflow 3

[The following is a continuation of a conversation that started in this post over at The Last Embassy. The conversation has gotten too unwildy to be contained in a simple post, so I'm migrating some of it over here.]

Some examples for beefeater to consider.

Enjelani Overflow 2

[The following is a continuation of a conversation that started in this post over at The Last Embassy. The conversation has gotten too unwildy to be contained in a simple post, so I'm migrating some of it over here.]

A response to beefeater's claim that local monopolies merely constitute "market failure".

Enjelani Overflow 1

[The following is a continuation of a conversation that started in this post over at The Last Embassy. The conversation has gotten too unwildy to be contained in a simple post, so I'm migrating some of it over here.]

A response to beefeater's claim that non-interference/market principles are "natural" and are not "human-made".