wink     ; )

Cluster Terminology

Many people who suffer from clusters hate that clusters are officially called "cluster headaches". The use of the word "headache" in many ways trivializes the pain that is being suffered. Make no mistake about it, a cluster is nothing like a standard tension headache. True, while a cluster entails an "ache" which is located in the "head", and is thus a "head-ache", it is only a "headache" technically. So telling someone who sufferers from clusters that it is only a "headache" is like telling a woman in labor that she is just having "cramps"--technically true inasmuch as labor is an involuntary contraction of the muscles, but still completely wrong.

Most people understand that a Migraine headache is something far worse than a standard tension headache. So I used to just tell people that Clusters were relatives of Migraines. But that doesn't seem to capture how bad they really are. So I have come up with a new description:

Tension headaches are toddlers throwing a temper tantrum. There's a lot of sound and fury, but very little actual damage gets done. Migraines are those toddlers when they've grown up and become rebellious teenage punks. They go on random sprees of destruction wreaking havoc just because they can. There's no pattern or malice, just mayhem. Damage but no direction, no focus. Clusters are when those Migraines have grown up and become disciplined torturers. They are rational and efficient. Systematic and methodical. They know how to inflict maximum pain, and they do it on a schedule because, hey, they've got other things going on in their lives too and can't spend all day torturing you.

(While I'm on the topic of terminology, I should note that I have taken a page from the Migraine camp and have been using the word "Cluster" to refer to a single headache. This is technically incorrect as a cluster is supposed to refer to an entire series of headaches. A single headache is supposed to be referred to as a "headache" or maybe as a "cluster headache". That, of course, runs into the problem described at the top of this post. So I use the word "Cluster" for a single headache, and a "round of Clusters" to describe the entire series. I feel that I have license to do so as people frequently talk about having a "Migraine", which in my mind is a parallel case.)